Tuesday, October 15, 2013

One "Invisible" Reason Why Ladies Are Cougars and Men Date Older Women

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Nowadays, it's pretty common to find couples with big age difference..."Cougars" do have their own subjective & logical reasons in their consciousness. They might find younger men more attractive because of how fun they can be, how they don't have to compete in career or maturity, and many other personal reasons. It goes the same for men who look for women way older than them. There could be a lot of other reasons that could be the "go for it factors". But here's ONE that I'd like to talk about and it is built through the type of parenting they experienced from their parents... meaning this could be one of  the reasons from the subconsciousness which supports their behavior.

1. Cougars (Women-men)
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Women who are attracted to younger men maybe because of the past experience on how the father treated her. An over dominant father may leave a mark in her subconscious, making her thirsty of freedom (may also be freedom of choice and so on depending on personal experience). It could also be on how she saw her father treated her mom, the bitterness stays inside (conscious or unconsciously). The basic human goal is to move out from inferiority and achieve superiority which then affects on her future relationships. Dating a younger men may quench her feeling of superiority that she had been missing in the past (aside from the other rational reasons she can come up with).

Well what about dating a way older man? This also kinda works the same way. If dating a younger man is because the need of feeling superior, then dating an older man is the need of a leader, protector, a decision maker, a responsible man, and so on. Looking back at the past experience, may lead to finding the parenting type of the father. May also be because of feeling neglected or being raised by a single parent (most likely be by the mother or grandmother)

2. Men-women
Men who are attracted to wayyy younger women (well this is also pretty common) but might also be because of an over dominant mother. Definitely needs the feeling of superiority and thus he can find from dating a young lady. Vice versa, men who dates an older women may be because the lack of experiencing his standard of a good mother. Therefore dating an older woman may give him the comfort and feeling loved, cared and so on.

We can never judge or generalize this to everyone. Everybody do have their own stories and experiences and there could be many other personal reasons why dating with a big gap of age is comfortable.. it is very subjective and can actually bring positive effects and fulfilling needs. This post also explains why good parenting is actually a big deal and has a strong effect in relationships. 


2 comments:

Interesting post!
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